The Barbie Telephone is plastic, incredible, and impractical

The Barbie Telephone, very similar to the doll it pays tribute to, is a factor of magnificence. However like that doll whose proportions, traditionally, are unimaginable, the Barbie Telephone simply isn’t constructed for the fashionable world.

Even when the ultra-feminine aesthetic isn’t your factor — and it’s probably not mine — you must hand it to the Barbie flip cellphone. From the field it is available in, to the interchangeable again plates, rhinestone stickers, and Barbie-fied interface, it’s a delight. The charger and battery are each pink, although they’re a lighter shade than Mattel’s trademarked Barbie Pink (Pantone 219). The cellphone says “Hello Barbie!” while you flip it on. It’s the definition of committing to the bit.

The breezy enjoyable of the Barbie aesthetic, Pantone 219 or in any other case, is at odds with the precise expertise of utilizing the cellphone. It’s primarily based on one in all HMD’s function telephones, and it runs an working system referred to as KaiOS. The cellphone is designed for fundamental connectivity — texting, calling, emails — and even features a internet browser.

In line with HMD, along with being cute, the nostalgic design and restricted function set are speculated to encourage you to disconnect and spend time with your pals IRL. There are a collection of “Barbie Suggestions” within the cellphone’s menus that advise you on this level. 

“No want to surrender the smartphone solely,” reads Barbie Tip 1. “Discover a steadiness between your smartphone and your Barbie Telephone.” Barbie Tip 6 is titled “DreamHouse™️ Rule” and encourages you to “Make tech-free zones in your individual DreamHouse. Extra room for enjoyable!” By the way, Mattel says it sells a Barbie DreamHouse each two minutes. The DreamHouse retails for $199.99; the Barbie Telephone is $129.99.

The thought of popping my SIM card within the Barbie cellphone and working away for a weekend of digital detoxing with my besties sounds nice. The fact isn’t really easy. Have you ever ever tried to enter your Google account password with an alphanumeric keypad? Have you learnt easy methods to discover the curly brackets in T9? I’ve and I do, due to the Barbie Telephone, and I don’t want that on anybody. Typing out messages with predictive textual content is extra tedious than I bear in mind; if I used this cellphone usually, I’d most likely name individuals much more.

Except for texting, a few of the options of this function cellphone simply didn’t work correctly for me. I efficiently synced my Google calendar, however my appointments seem on the flawed days for causes I can’t discern. I couldn’t get the FM radio app to acknowledge the wired earbuds I plugged into the three.5mm jack. The net browser is painfully gradual and refuses to render The Verge in any usable kind, although I understand I’m most likely the one one who would try and learn The Verge on the Barbie Telephone.

The delight I felt once I first unboxed the Barbie Telephone was positively fading. Even the entrance of the cellphone, which is usually lined by a mirror, seemed loads much less charming lined in my very own fingerprints and smudges. And I assume having a mirror on the entrance of your cellphone is cute, as a result of you possibly can body up your selfies and test your tooth for items of kale.

However you realize when it’s not cute? Having to have a look at your individual face each time you test for a notification. This can be a sort of existential dilemma that Barbie doesn’t must endure, as a result of Barbie’s make-up is pre-applied and he or she’s perpetually twenty two or no matter. I don’t wish to see my face once I’m checking texts, 4 espressos deep on a Tuesday morning with nary a drop of concealer underneath my eyes.

Barbie’s world is a dream. Sadly, the world through which the Barbie Telephone lets me escape the drudgery of contemporary connectivity additionally appears to be a dream. Positive, it let me take just a little trip from my smartphone and nonetheless textual content my pals. However principally, it simply changed the annoyances of utilizing an ultra-connected machine with completely different annoyances.

Somebody extra dedicated to utilizing T9 might most likely have an gratifying time with the Barbie Telephone. In any other case, that is only a neat collectible merchandise; one thing to take out of the field and play with for some time, however in the end go away in a drawer. Form of like a doll.

Pictures by Allison Johnson / The Verge